Practicing Reverse Voodoo

Sometimes I feel like I have all these little drains slowly seeping my strength away.  Just little holes poked in in my energy field.  In my day-to-day life I’m not really aware of them.  Each time a poke happens, the hole is barely noticeable, just a little jab quickly brushed away in most cases. 

Over time, these little drains add up.  This week I realized how tired I am and how much effort I’ve actually been putting into each of those little jabs…ruminating about old stuff on the way to work…disturbing, angry dreams at night. 

It’s time for me to perform a little reverse voodoo. 

Uh oh…we’re going to get a little freaky now…well, not really.

Reverse voodoo is finding all the “pin holes” in myself and pulling the “pin” out.  These pins are old wounds, unfinished business, what-I-should-have-saids, misunderstandings, worries about the future, and other thoughts that steal my energy.  Many of these things are really nothing (I say to myself), so why do I still wander there? 

Carolyn Myss says it best: we have a limited amount of energy “currency” in the here and now – how much are we spending it in the past?  What does that leave us with to use in the present?  Don’t give your energy away on “stuff”!

I pull out the pins by asking myself a few questions, usually on paper:

• When my mind wanders into old grievances or hurts, where does it go?
• When I’m there, how do I feel?
• Why do I feel that way?
• How does feeling this way help me today?
• Can I consciously let go of this?

There’s nothing like a little ritual to help the mind really grasp what you want it to do.  I take the papers, one for each energy drain, and say a little prayer out loud while I (safely) burn each one, addressing these thoughts and emotions:

Thank you for serving me in my time of need.  You’ve provided a lesson in who I am as well as who I am not.  You’ve shaped my thoughts and at the time of your creation protected me.  Because of you I’ve grown.  Your use has passed.  Through God’s grace, leave me now.

I inhale a great breath and let it out in peace, refreshed.

Majeeda Rosa

An angel entered my life five years ago

About five years ago, my husband was going through a rough patch and so I prayed. You know, one of those desperate, hands clasped and rocking back-and-forth prayers ending with "pleasepleaseplease...."

The kind where you bargain. Know what I mean?

It was resoundingly answered the next day.

If you ask, truly ask from your heart and not your head, you'll get your answer. You might not know it's the answer until later of course - time offers perspective.

Remember Clarence in It's a Wonderful Life? Clarence came into our lives, only his name is Jake. Probably the most ornery little terrier you'll ever meet. White with black floppy ears and silky curls, although we couldn't determine that until later as he was quite covered in filth. His little legs were wobbly and he was trying not to fall over while dodging cars in the gas station parking lot. We thought we were saving him when we scooped him up and brought him home.

 

Jake saved us.

My prayer the night before was for my husband to find happiness in his life. We kid around (but not really) that Jake was so ornery in Heaven that he lost his wings in a fight and has to earn them again. He's fulfilling his job admirably - he's the most lovable, rascally, happiness-giving little cuss you'll ever meet.

Today's prayer:

Dear Lord, thank you for Jake. The road has been a little rough - it's hard opening your heart and when it's so vulnerable - but the joy he's brought has been worth every minute. His antics and his compassion are tremendous. As he gets older please treat him kindly. Help us to provide for his needs as he provides for ours. Thank you.

Majeeda Rosa