Be Radiant

How many times have a said I’ll do something then….(fizzle snap)

Distractals and sparklies abide everywhere: Facebook, Pinterest, TV, magazines, snacking, housework, playing with the beasties…so many things to do instead of self-analysis.  Why is it tough to look inside?

As mentioned in my last post, I’m exploring my values – unearthing the unconscious ones and examining if I’m in alignment with the ones I THINK I live by.  Right now, I’m examining why I’m avoiding examining! 

Do I value introspection? Emphatically, yes!  It fits with my values of open-mindedness and balance, as well as a part of what feeds my spirit.  It's about examining my beliefs, my thoughts, my motives, learning why I feel and act the way I do.  How else can I discover my purpose in life as well as my programming?  One by one I peel away each layer of belief that really isn't mine.  I might have borrowed it to fill a gap or simply accepted it through trust, peer pressure or just plain laziness.  Those ideas garnered from family, friends, teachers and TV that I’ve blindly accepted – for good or bad – how do they serve me?  How do they harm me?

There is no truth, folks, only perception.  So if all of this navel-gazing contemplation is so valuable, why am I avoiding it? 

Because whether you deal with it or live with it, your perception is altered.  You have to ask yourself if you’re living/acting/breathing your core values.  If you’re not living your core values, your energy is leaking.  If you ARE…then you’re radiant. 

So where to start?  Navel gazing is best done in small doses.  Instead of shutting down on introspection overload, here's how I handle it:

·        Focus on one thing and follow it.  Jot down digressions for another time.

·        Live with the new knowledge for a few weeks…or more.  Roll it around, see what it feels like.

·        Finally, change…or don’t, but either way follow the energy.

Now go be radiant.

Majeeda Rosa

Just be

How's Your Bubble?

How's your "life bubble" - that comfortable space consisting of practices, people, and opinions that form your reality? We all live in one. It's comfortable. Familiar. Expected: if THIS, then THAT...knowable. We're experts, anthropologists of our own bubble world.

Or are we?

Like any good scientist, this anthropologist needs to conduct some observations. Maybe run some experiments. The native is restless.

Hmmm...do I detect a loss of territory? Have my experiences to date led me to limiting beliefs? Are there concepts and opinions that have become "facts" within my bubble world? Do I discount any challenges to my facts as exceptions to the rule? How about "can't" and "won't" - have they grown like invasive Kudzu? Why "can't" I?

It's hard to challenge reality, uncover the uncomfortable.

The thing I'm most scared of is that there's no such thing as a little change. What if my bubble bursts? Everything expected and knowable is gone. How do you get comfortable with that?

God, in your unfathomable expansiveness, open my mind. Let me gather my thoughts and conclusions not as flowers to collect, but seeds to plant so that they continue to grow. Bless me with foresight learned from experience and judgment that expands with perspective. Help me be comfortable with not knowing and experience the moment for what is rather than what I want it to be. Amen.

Practicing Reverse Voodoo

Sometimes I feel like I have all these little drains slowly seeping my strength away.  Just little holes poked in in my energy field.  In my day-to-day life I’m not really aware of them.  Each time a poke happens, the hole is barely noticeable, just a little jab quickly brushed away in most cases. 

Over time, these little drains add up.  This week I realized how tired I am and how much effort I’ve actually been putting into each of those little jabs…ruminating about old stuff on the way to work…disturbing, angry dreams at night. 

It’s time for me to perform a little reverse voodoo. 

Uh oh…we’re going to get a little freaky now…well, not really.

Reverse voodoo is finding all the “pin holes” in myself and pulling the “pin” out.  These pins are old wounds, unfinished business, what-I-should-have-saids, misunderstandings, worries about the future, and other thoughts that steal my energy.  Many of these things are really nothing (I say to myself), so why do I still wander there? 

Carolyn Myss says it best: we have a limited amount of energy “currency” in the here and now – how much are we spending it in the past?  What does that leave us with to use in the present?  Don’t give your energy away on “stuff”!

I pull out the pins by asking myself a few questions, usually on paper:

• When my mind wanders into old grievances or hurts, where does it go?
• When I’m there, how do I feel?
• Why do I feel that way?
• How does feeling this way help me today?
• Can I consciously let go of this?

There’s nothing like a little ritual to help the mind really grasp what you want it to do.  I take the papers, one for each energy drain, and say a little prayer out loud while I (safely) burn each one, addressing these thoughts and emotions:

Thank you for serving me in my time of need.  You’ve provided a lesson in who I am as well as who I am not.  You’ve shaped my thoughts and at the time of your creation protected me.  Because of you I’ve grown.  Your use has passed.  Through God’s grace, leave me now.

I inhale a great breath and let it out in peace, refreshed.

Majeeda Rosa

A Perfect Day

Sometimes I go through life too fast. I feel like I’m running on a hamster wheel, going through the motions of life. I’m programmed to get up at a certain time, go to work on certain days, have certain expectations of what my goals should be...

Oh boy. There’s that word – SHOULD

Have you ever noticed that when you capitalize it, SHOULD looks like SHROUD?

I have to be careful of SHOULDs. It’s not that SHOULDs are bad, only that I need them in the right balance. Yes I SHOULD go to work…because I not only need the money, I also enjoy many aspects of my career. I SHOULD exercise…because if I’m not healthy and fit I won’t live the life I want to experience.

The real question is: How many times do I think I should do or think [fill in the blank] and it takes a bite out of my personal power instead of enriching it? Life may be speeding by in a grey blur because my SHOULDs are mistaken for WANTS, and my NEEDs are mistaken for SHOULDs. It’s a topsy-turvy world I live in.

Time to get my head on straight.  What would a perfect day look like, one that honors my soul?

Holy Sophia, fill me with wisdom, help me define the actions and thoughts that feed my soul. Let me bring them to light, recognize them and live them. Enable me to discern between true needs and distractions, passion versus fancy. Empower me in every sense to manifest the gifts you’ve so graciously provided. Thank you.

Majeeda Rosa